Cereal Thoughts

I'm one of those people who has dialogues in their head constantly. I try not to be that person who already has what they're going to say ready before it's even their turn to speak but on occasion that is definitely me. I usually find myself replaying things from the day before in my head during my morning cereal at work. I get a good five minutes to think things over and obsess over things I told myself I'd already let go. This is where Anthony would say something like, "I thought we already ended this conversation?" or "Didn't we decide not to bring this up again?" Because for some odd reason he can just let things go easily and pretend nothing ever happened or at least pretend that he is pretending nothing ever happened. It's like a form of trickery. Two hours after and argument I'll suddenly blurt out that I'm still angry. And he's thinking… Didn't we just have twelve tiny conversations in between then and now? WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY WIFE?! Honestly, I don't know. I think it has something to do with the fact that I read books where people like Mr. Darcy ignore our heroine for weeks and then SUDDENLY he's walking the garden and he's written a letter expressing his undying love for her. I mean yes I get to experience the part where I'm ignored but WHERE'S MY LOVE LETTER?! Just saying, life isn't fair. You know?! It just occurred to me that Anthony is going to read this post and say something witty to me like "Books obviously corrupt your sense of reality" next time I tell him he needs to sit down and read with me to improve his vocabulary. Yes I am THAT person. So this morning I was eating my cereal and I was thinking about what happens when you finally break down and cry. You're having an argument and it just hits you and you decide that crying is definitely a viable option at this point. Your thoughts go from… 'Am I crying loud? Oh no my nose is stuffy and I can't breathe! Crap! My eyes are going to be SO swollen tomorrow morning' to 'Why is this happening to me? Am I crazy? Does he even care that I'm crying? Why do people have to die? Does he even love me anymore?' For some reason those stupid tears running down your face cause you to relive every horrible moment you've ever experienced all at once. I don't know what it is, but I don't think it's fair.

Those are my cereal thoughts for today.

Have a good one.

Kels

on a side note - I love my husband very much.
He wants to make it clear I don't cry 24/7 - so I'm clarifying.
What a man.